If you want to change your circumstances, you will need to make some changes. Sounds obvious, but you’d be surprised how often people think they can change their circumstances without changing themselves, their environment, or who they spend time with.
Did you know that your income is the average of the income of your ten best friends, or the ten people with whom you spend the most time? Income is a great indicator because it’s something you can actually measure—as opposed to other less tangible markers.
This is not to make anyone bad or wrong—it’s to raise awareness. Because most people tend to hang around with people with whom they feel comfortable—which means they are often at a similar level of success, income, and life satisfaction as they are. So think about it: who do you spend most of your time with? And how does that feel to you? You might call that a “comfort zone,” because what’s familiar is comfortable just because it’s known.
I like to call it a pain zone or stagnant zone, because very often you are staying in a way of life, at an income level, or in a relationship that really isn’t what you want—but it’s familiar, and you like having other people around to whom it is also familiar. You are in (often unconscious, but not always) agreement about how life is, about money, about work or business, and about relationships. And you co-create a similar reality, often without realizing it.
And if you want this to change, you have to change—inside and out.
So seek out people who inspire you. Because if your life and your business aren’t just the way you want 
them to be, and if you’re not as prosperous as you would like, then you need to spend time with people who have already mastered what you want.
I know that as I did that with my business—when I committed to really go places I had never been before, I had to seek out people who had gone there before me. I had done this before as a graduate student—I found a great mentor who helped me tremendously. And when I joined Nikken, the holistic health network marketing company that was my first real business, I did so because I hooked up with people who really knew that business. And when I went into the healing arts, I sought out and found the best healers to teach and mentor me.
Yet somehow when it came to building my healing practice I thought I could do it myself. I think that is partly because that’s the model for many healers: you get trained in your modality, then sent off to figure the business part out by yourself. Only that’s a whole additional skill set and mindset. So I did it mostly on my own—and I did well considering. But to really get it, I had to find people who already knew it. And that’s when everything changed.
So find people who have gone where you want to go. Seek out higher-level thinkers, people with bigger incomes and successful businesses. Be willing to ask for support, to learn, to stretch, and to take in the vibration of people you admire. And be willing to be uncomfortable doing so. Because the truth is that change will challenge you to do things differently, to feel different, to expand your mind, to shed your conditioning. And that is not always easy. Sometimes it’s downright terrifying—at first.
I am reflecting on this as I have just completed a Mastermind retreat with a group of people I’ve been working with for almost two years. A few of the people have changed, but for the most part the group is the same. And the growth is incredible. Everyone’s revenue has increased, most of us are six or multiple-six figure earners, and one of our number is about to have her first seven-figure year. Being a part of this group has inspired and pushed me in ways that have been uncomfortable, creative, exciting, and enlivening. I am so grateful for this experience!
Seek those who inspire, excite, and challenge you. Be willing to be uncomfortable! Stop tolerating the ways you’ve made your discomfort okay, and do what you came here to do. Find people whose very presence will change you in a positive way. Today. Do it today.
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